Individual Pages!

Friday, February 28, 2014

February 28 2014


Writing Attempt: Continuation



His hair was perfectly lit by the fire. Dahlia took her mug to her lips and gulped in the cold anise tea and took in the scene. She remembered the first ballet she ever saw, Romeo & Juliet, and let the music flow over the slow, pained movements of the lit man in front of her. Dahlia took in another long sip and smiled. She liked to watch.

***

Hero’s tail had been amputated after he was hit by the Chevy Astro. Which was only hours before his name was changed from Bailey to Hero.  

The kids seemed to take to him more after the whole incident. Jillie was finally happy to seek his affection and Jackie took on the role of caretaker and friend. Dahlia watched the three of them from the car, Jackie throwing the ball for Hero and Jill tackling him as his jaws clamped around the fuzzy green sphere in triumph. It had been three years since Kyle had left and seeing the ease of play in the girls that afternoon made Dahlia finally feel like things were moving on.

***

The phone call came around 2am. Jillie, following a long temper tantrum had just fallen asleep, Jackie had conked out four hours before. Dahlia weighed her options. If she left now, she could be back home before the girls woke up, but since Jillie had devoured a Popsicle only 30 minutes before bed she worried that she would be beckoned much earlier than that.

After the third phone call, Dahlia realized there was no one coming to watch over the girls. Decision time. Dahlia mentally calculated the funds for the month. After rent, after groceries, after the car payment and less the child support…they were in the negative. The call came again. She hesitated to answer, but did.

“Sweet Caroline to your rescue.” She crooned.

“I’m starting in 15. Tell me you’re coming now.” The voice over the phone was intriguingly gruff. Dahlia took in a deep breath.

“Postpone for 10 and I’ll leave in 5.”

“You’re toying with me.”

“I’m giving you orders.” Dahlia rifled through her underwear drawer. “Defy me and the cost goes up.” She lit the blunt she was looking for.

“I’ll give you 5.” The voice waivered.

“You’ll give me 10, and allow for 15.” Dahlia exhaled directly into the receiver.

“See you then.” The voice hung up.

Dahlia took 3 minutes to check each room. 2 minutes to put on her Kevlar. 1 minute to get in and start the car and arrived exactly on time.

***

 _____________________________________
I know.
I apologize.

-Classy Biped



Sunday, February 23, 2014

February 23 2014

Writing Attempt: New


His hair was perfectly lit by the fire. Dahlia took her mug to her lips and gulped in the cold anise tea and took in the scene. She remembered the first ballet she ever saw, Romeo & Juliet, and let the music flow over the slow, pained movements of the lit man in front of her. Dahlia took in another long sip and smiled. She liked to watch.

***

Hero’s tail had been amputated after he was hit by the Chevy Astro. Which was only hours before his name was changed from Bailey to Hero.  

The kids seemed to take to him more after the whole incident. Jillie was finally happy to seek his affection and Jackie took on the role of caretaker and friend. Dahlia watched the three of them from the car, Jackie throwing the ball for Hero and Jill tackling him as his jaws clamped around the fuzzy green sphere in triumph. It had been three years since Kyle had left and seeing the ease of play in the girls that afternoon made Dahlia finally feel like things were moving on.

----------------------

I wrote from one of the first lines I wrote the other day. I missed yesterday because of my show - I passed out tired when I got home. Since we had a matinee today, tonight I got a little more time and got to eat some 'za with the mr. biped and drink some terrible wine. I hope everyone is well. I am...getting there.


Classy Biped

Thursday, February 20, 2014

February 20 2014


Writing Attempt: Writing a bunch of good first lines.

 

Children were the only commodity.

 

 

After the fourth click, the revolver finally shot a bullet.

 

 

“These bones are proof that Hock was not killed here.”

“How?”

“How? How because they are not the bones of Hock, they are the bones of a coyote.”

 

 

When I was five, I was given a new name. Crystal. I would have loved it. If it hadn’t been given to me by the man that took me from my own home.

 

His hair was lit perfectly by the fire.

 

“Stacy?” She said. “Why is it exactly you are out to kill me?”

 

 

 
--------

just some fun. :)

ClassyBiped

February 19th 2014


Writing Attempt: Editing (Nate and the Tooth)



 
RACHEL
***

Dr. Oulette stared at the pile of intake forms on his desk and muttered one word over and over: fuck. He called Rachel into his office. Her slow approach was accented by her signature gum snap sonata.

“David?” Rachel’s hip opened the door and kept it open. “What’d you need? I got through the call list. Only four pick-ups. Joaquin Jackson is finally paid in full.”

“Surprising.”

“Only took 6 years. Pretty sure he lost the fillings by now.”

“Rachel, don’t judge. You know-“

“I know, sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“So what’dya want?” Rachel pillaged her pocket for her pen.

“This mandatory healthcare act is fucking fantastic until I have to intake 34 patients in three days and decide who to make priority. I need some front desk intel, if you will.”

“Okay?”

“If I’m going to make this work, while in turn making us a living, I need to find the exact right order to accept these patients in.”

“Okay?” Rachel hit her pen against her teeth three times, then scribbled, ‘riGht Order – PAtients (?) WTF Mr. O’ on her notepad. She touched the end of the pen to her temple. “Maybe something as simple as alphabetical order could work just as well?”

“No. I need the long vs the short term. Who, from what you could tell, is a long-term over a one off? We need to get the one/two visit customers first so we can collect the funds, while slowly courting the possible new relationships.” He pushed the intake mountain towards Rachel. “Just sift and organize – first calls top, descending from there down. Make sense?”

The snap of Rachel’s gum echoed through the closed office. The squeak of Oulette’s sneakers made Rachel’s blood pressure rise. The chill outside made the Dr. thankful that he could afford a car with remote start and seat warmers. The draft from Oulette’s exit shifted the intake mountain from the desk to the floor. Rachel sighed angrily and picked up the only form left on his desk. It read Nate Gowarski and had a large ‘x’ over one of the teeth in the intake diagram. Diagnoses: his lower left molar was good as dead. Oulette’s written suggestion was to simply remove it. In - out a couple hours and one prescription for Oxy.  She looked through his status. Job - decent. DOB – not surprising. Health Care - new. Rachel smirked the little smirk she spent every day behind this desk hiding, placed Nate Gowarski’s file at the top of her list then resumed her front desk duties for Dr. O.

One by one, she hunted for good leads. Good insurance, good jobs, bad teeth. The image of bridges, braces, dentures and reconstruction filling her head as if it were a tooth and her mind a cavity. There was the lawyer that found her career more important than her health. The Single father of four with ten cavities that recently got a hefty insurance check from his wife’s death. The former meth head with SSDI benefits and 20 years of enamel destruction to replace. These were the people who were going to buy her a new car. With seat warmers, of course.    

***

The goddamn phone at 7am? Nate threw his pillow straight up into the air so it would land on his head. Once it did, he immediately regretted the uncomfortable feeling of the action but applauded the result. The phone rang out. Silenced. Then took a moment to beep its stupid beeps that Nate had chosen for it to beep. He looked at the screen. VM. He looked at the schedule printout for work he kept on his side of the bed. Today was not a work day so he deemed this call irrelevant until he decided to get up and make it relevant.

***

Please, please don’t pick up. Rachel thought. She counted rings. One, two, three, four – it felt like waiting for a tree to mature. Suddenly - VM – perfect. Rachel left a cryptic message. As she spoke, she tried to mirror the sort of corporate speak the Dr. had instilled in her so as to uphold her presence as a representative of the dental profession. After the final beep, she hung the phone on its cradle, exhaled a sigh of relief and moved onto the next patient. As she dialed the number, a tiny twinge of guilt made her right eye twitch. It wasn’t right to let this poor man’s tooth get worse. It wasn’t right to hope that if he just didn’t pick up the phone to schedule an appointment that in even just a month, the tooth would become a little toxic warrior and take down a row of teeth. The eye righted itself. Rachel snapped her gum and dialed the last number for Mrs. Johnston.

“Hello?”

“Hi, is Mrs. Johnston in?”

“This is she. May I ask who’s calling?”

“Mrs. Johnston, this is Rachel from the front desk at Dr. Oulette’s office. I understand you may need a few root canals. Why don’t we set up a second consultation for you and begin healing some of that excruciating pain you must be going through.”

 

***
For some stupid reason, my computer got weird and shut down and so my post didn't post last night, so today I continued what I was doing and am posting that as a combo. I'm going through tech week so my hours with work and that are looooong. Making it through though...barely.
 
Classy  Biped

Monday, February 17, 2014

February 17 2014

The world is not the human race. It is its own living thing that is comprised of its own topography and history.

Human babies are not only comprised of an egg and a single sperm.

Opinions are not like assholes. I didn't have one until I was 20. (Thanks upbringing)

Art is not only made by people. (Questions?  See above)

Depression and its similar friends are subjective,  and yet completely, terrifyingly real.

Yiu will never ever know someone 100%. (Sorry)

Pets can exhibit the less known (possibly secretive) behaviors of their owners.

General education is just that.

Family is...a concept. And sometimes a trap.

My thoughts about anything are my thoughts. No one else has to have them.








Sunday, February 16, 2014

February 16 2014

Writing Attempt: Venting.


Here’s what I hate: The way you tell me that everything is going to be ok, then turn around and make it worse.

Not even worse, but create a new bad thing.

 

Here’s what I love: The fact that I know that I am capable of rejecting the things (including you) that upset me.

 

Here’s what I hate: that because I have to work a job to make money and still cannot support myself and do my art, I am bound to the horrible “you’’ and cannot reject the things that upset me.

 

Here’s what I love: The days where I have more than an hour to myself.

 

Here’s what I hate: The hours I have alone.

 

Here’s what I love: The prospect of…

 

Here’s what I hate: The inability to fulfill….
----------


I am so stressed  But I'll make it. Starting my show this week. Wish me a broken appendage.

ClassyBiped

Saturday, February 15, 2014

February 15 2014


The tiny crack in his skin was deepening.

 

Two years previous, Jorge had woken up angry and thirsty from a bad, bad dream. After ingesting a full 20oz of water, brushing his teeth, frying three eggs, adding Tapatio, taking a bite – there was a pain.

 

Two weeks ago, Jorge googled “skin fungus”

 

Two weeks ago, he bought anti-fungal cream and Vaseline.

 

Last night he drank 7 whisky sodas.

 

Before bed he shakily put on the cream.

 

When he woke up this morning, the crack had lengthened.

 

When he bing’d it he felt worse.

 

At work he felt like a monster.

 

At home he tried to find more reasons not to be.

 

In the mirror, the ever growing gash on his face made his decision to be peaceful hard to abide by.

 

 

 
---------------------------

CLRSSSSYB

Friday, February 14, 2014

February 14 2014

Writing attempt: ? Just fucking doing it.

His hair was long. His hands wide. His young body hidden by a large, black coat.

My hair was short. My eyes were wide. My young body had been treated to an application of ink that morning.

I was a Junior and in the middle of a massive mania that lasted for a few years. He was a young freshman nervously tasting the first bite of adulthood.

Its been 9 years.

Not always together.

Not always apart.

Today I am taking a.moment to appreciate the things he's given me.

He taught me to lesson my grip and lower my high expectations by being simple. By trusting an untrustworthy, he made me more so.The gift of living small. The understanding when I can't seem to do so.

"We are two independent people who decided to live their lives together." -Claire HOC season 2.

-----

I'm not going to be angry for not posting yesterday. I normally would but I had little time. I worked from 9 to 530 then had class from 6-930 then had a staff party from then on out. Free booze and karaoke with awesome musicians. I sang No Doubt.

Love-

Classy Biped

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

February 12 2014


Writing Attempt: Found Poetry

 

Despite his misgivings

Reed gave the scanners a try

And our disconnect

(Police assured)

Was legal to gather

And to share

60,000 To lines for life

If we don’t use it, they know

It felt invasive

(Nor did they care)

Millennials don’t care

We’ve just been brought up to expect

Everyone has access to that information

Wry anecdotes

Vasectomy that left me

Chasing the ticks of my biological clock all the way home

(On the rebound in search of sperm)

You are the afternoon date girl

Ryan didn’t seem bothered by his lackluster performance

Or my superior score

I pinched myself under the hand drying unit

 

February 11 2014

I am writing. I am writing. I am writing. I am not writing.


Today I told a friend the story of me delivering my only sister. I love and loathe this story. Maybe someday I will perfect the story to the point of being able to write it down.

Monday, February 10, 2014

February 10 2014


Writing attempt: Inspired by the Memoir I'm Reading
 
Big Bird was everything. Mom was everything. Dad was everything. I was 4.

 

I remember nothing except the replay. My father had borrowed the neighbor’s video recorder in order to archive his first child’s first trike ride. I don’t remember how they presented it to me (was it my birthday? Was it summer?) but I do know that the arrival of the yellow plastic trike with my beloved Big Bird at the helm was akin to being personally visited by the sun, leaving the rest of the world in the shadow of the moon.

The video went as such: I, deep cut bangs, ruffle collar polo and no shoes, put my tiny sausage feet on the pedals and freeze. My hands grip tightly around the handlebars in what seems to be frustration. I look to the camera (my father) at the top of the driveway filming me in profile and furrow my brow. The expression on my face will be repeated throughout my life.

TL;DW (too long; didn’t write) I beckoned the camera over with my eyes. The camera moves closer, my need for help broadcasted through my root-beer colored eyes. My mother appears behind me and instructs me to push. My little thigh muscles tense as she places her right foot on the back of the bike and pushes me into a start. I ride for a few feet then come to the tiny hill of the neighbor’s driveway. Here I stop and roll back. Here I put my feet on the ground in defeat and look back to the camera, using my eye plea. Here my mother pushes again and gets me over the hump. Here I make it more than three feet and as I make it over the third neighbors drive I look back to the camera for approval. The camera cheers me on. My mother follows closely and employs her foot tenderly enough that I do not notice its help.

Thinking now about this emotional transaction, I realize that my 4 year old mind would give anything for my father, the camera, to record every accomplishment and be proud. Thinking about it now, I realize that I knew the help my mother was giving and wanted even more so for her to just look at me when I was struggling and push. Looking back now and watching my root-beer colored eyes foam at their mouth for the father cameras approval, I see that if put in this same situation today, I’d be enraged by his opinion and frustrated if she finally, honestly tried to push me forward towards the goal I had set for myself.

Looking back, I realize, we all have barely changed.

 

     
--------------------------------------

This was better in my head. Still like it though. Felt like giving up tonight. Glad I didn't

-Classy Biped

February 10 2014


Writing attempt: Inspired by the Memoir I'm Reading
 
Big Bird was everything. Mom was everything. Dad was everything. I was 4.

 

I remember nothing except the replay. My father had borrowed the neighbor’s video recorder in order to archive his first child’s first trike ride. I don’t remember how they presented it to me (was it my birthday? Was it summer?) but I do know that the arrival of the yellow plastic trike with my beloved Big Bird at the helm was akin to being personally visited by the sun, leaving the rest of the world in the shadow of the moon.

The video went as such: I, deep cut bangs, ruffle collar polo and no shoes, put my tiny sausage feet on the pedals and freeze. My hands grip tightly around the handlebars in what seems to be frustration. I look to the camera (my father) at the top of the driveway filming me in profile and furrow my brow. The expression on my face will be repeated throughout my life.

TL;DW (too long; didn’t write) I beckoned the camera over with my eyes. The camera moves closer, my need for help broadcasted through my root-beer colored eyes. My mother appears behind me and instructs me to push. My little thigh muscles tense as she places her right foot on the back of the bike and pushes me into a start. I ride for a few feet then come to the tiny hill of the neighbor’s driveway. Here I stop and roll back. Here I put my feet on the ground in defeat and look back to the camera, using my eye plea. Here my mother pushes again and gets me over the hump. Here I make it more than three feet and as I make it over the third neighbors drive I look back to the camera for approval. The camera cheers me on. My mother follows closely and employs her foot tenderly enough that I do not notice its help.

Thinking now about this emotional transaction, I realize that my 4 year old mind would give anything for my father, the camera, to record every accomplishment and be proud. Thinking about it now, I realize that I knew the help my mother was giving and wanted even more so for her to just look at me when I was struggling and push. Looking back now and watching my root-beer colored eyes foam at their mouth for the father cameras approval, I see that if put in this same situation today, I’d be enraged by his opinion and frustrated if she finally, honestly tried to push me forward towards the goal I had set for myself.

Looking back, I realize, we all have barely changed.

 

     
--------------------------------------

This was better in my head. Still like it though. Felt like giving up tonight. Glad I didn't

-Classy Biped

February 10 2014


Writing attempt: Inspired by the Memoir I'm Reading
 
Big Bird was everything. Mom was everything. Dad was everything. I was 4.

 

I remember nothing except the replay. My father had borrowed the neighbor’s video recorder in order to archive his first child’s first trike ride. I don’t remember how they presented it to me (was it my birthday? Was it summer?) but I do know that the arrival of the yellow plastic trike with my beloved Big Bird at the helm was akin to being personally visited by the sun, leaving the rest of the world in the shadow of the moon.

The video went as such: I, deep cut bangs, ruffle collar polo and no shoes, put my tiny sausage feet on the pedals and freeze. My hands grip tightly around the handlebars in what seems to be frustration. I look to the camera (my father) at the top of the driveway filming me in profile and furrow my brow. The expression on my face will be repeated throughout my life.

TL;DW (too long; didn’t write) I beckoned the camera over with my eyes. The camera moves closer, my need for help broadcasted through my root-beer colored eyes. My mother appears behind me and instructs me to push. My little thigh muscles tense as she places her right foot on the back of the bike and pushes me into a start. I ride for a few feet then come to the tiny hill of the neighbor’s driveway. Here I stop and roll back. Here I put my feet on the ground in defeat and look back to the camera, using my eye plea. Here my mother pushes again and gets me over the hump. Here I make it more than three feet and as I make it over the third neighbors drive I look back to the camera for approval. The camera cheers me on. My mother follows closely and employs her foot tenderly enough that I do not notice its help.

Thinking now about this emotional transaction, I realize that my 4 year old mind would give anything for my father, the camera, to record every accomplishment and be proud. Thinking about it now, I realize that I knew the help my mother was giving and wanted even more so for her to just look at me when I was struggling and push. Looking back now and watching my root-beer colored eyes foam at their mouth for the father cameras approval, I see that if put in this same situation today, I’d be enraged by his opinion and frustrated if she finally, honestly tried to push me forward towards the goal I had set for myself.

Looking back, I realize, we all have barely changed.

 

     
--------------------------------------

This was better in my head. Still like it though. Felt like giving up tonight. Glad I didn't

-Classy Biped

February 10 2014


Writing attempt: Inspired by the Memoir I'm Reading
 
Big Bird was everything. Mom was everything. Dad was everything. I was 4.

 

I remember nothing except the replay. My father had borrowed the neighbor’s video recorder in order to archive his first child’s first trike ride. I don’t remember how they presented it to me (was it my birthday? Was it summer?) but I do know that the arrival of the yellow plastic trike with my beloved Big Bird at the helm was akin to being personally visited by the sun, leaving the rest of the world in the shadow of the moon.

The video went as such: I, deep cut bangs, ruffle collar polo and no shoes, put my tiny sausage feet on the pedals and freeze. My hands grip tightly around the handlebars in what seems to be frustration. I look to the camera (my father) at the top of the driveway filming me in profile and furrow my brow. The expression on my face will be repeated throughout my life.

TL;DW (too long; didn’t write) I beckoned the camera over with my eyes. The camera moves closer, my need for help broadcasted through my root-beer colored eyes. My mother appears behind me and instructs me to push. My little thigh muscles tense as she places her right foot on the back of the bike and pushes me into a start. I ride for a few feet then come to the tiny hill of the neighbor’s driveway. Here I stop and roll back. Here I put my feet on the ground in defeat and look back to the camera, using my eye plea. Here my mother pushes again and gets me over the hump. Here I make it more than three feet and as I make it over the third neighbors drive I look back to the camera for approval. The camera cheers me on. My mother follows closely and employs her foot tenderly enough that I do not notice its help.

Thinking now about this emotional transaction, I realize that my 4 year old mind would give anything for my father, the camera, to record every accomplishment and be proud. Thinking about it now, I realize that I knew the help my mother was giving and wanted even more so for her to just look at me when I was struggling and push. Looking back now and watching my root-beer colored eyes foam at their mouth for the father cameras approval, I see that if put in this same situation today, I’d be enraged by his opinion and frustrated if she finally, honestly tried to push me forward towards the goal I had set for myself.

Looking back, I realize, we all have barely changed.

 

     
--------------------------------------

This was better in my head. Still like it though. Felt like giving up tonight. Glad I didn't

-Classy Biped

Sunday, February 9, 2014

February 9 2014


Writing Attempt: Journal/Blogging

 

Snow days – like any free days are a blessing and a curse. When I have too much time to myself, I begin to think and when I begin to think I begin to either become:

a)    Anxious

b)    Existential

c)    Depressed

d)    Enraged                                              (To be honest, I usually hit a-h within the day)

e)    Annoyed

f)     Vengeful

g)    Numb

h)    Ecstatic

 

Anxious: I exist in a worry about something that is out of my control. Today, I had a nightmare about my brother’s wedding that could be summed up like this – I was naked or in a dress that didn’t fit me, while simultaneously being shamed and degraded by my family members for not having children of my own yet having opinions about LITERALLY ANYTHING.

Existential: I woke up so incredibly exhausted from said dream that after I had brushed, peed and drank a cup of water, I passed out on the sofa. (Within the 10 minutes that this took, I had already questioned the meaning of my life, my cat’s, the girl downstairs’, replayed every death I’ve experienced and compared my life to literally everyone I’ve ever known coming up with the (often) hypothesis that I am absolutely worthless.

Depressed: I fell asleep to the sound of ice cracking and sliding off the roof. I felt drunk or drugged and the cat rushed in to sit on my head and knead my thoughts away. Instead I cried and the cat left. I thought about every tiny imperfection on my body. I realized that even the cat knows. Even he can’t b around me when I am this way. When I am a self-loathing me. I grabbed my belly and shook it in anger. I fell asleep. I grabbed my arms and shook them with anger. I fell asleep. I listened to the wind and public radio mingle like folks at a ten year reunion and cried. I heard a story about a group of nuns who were part of an important study in neuroscience highlighting the fact that the reason they were chosen was the fact that nuns are some of the most healthy specimens on the planet. I thought about this, understood it. Felt shame. Then cried.

Enraged: I’m sorry I can’t pay my student loan at a bigger rate! Why the hell is this place always so dirty! Why is it that I can’t have a decent apartment for once! Why can’t I be seen as a legitimate artist in this town! Why does the cat think it’s the most important entity in room! Why must I be the one to clean up after every entity in my apartment! Why can’t I just relax and be okay with my life! Why am I unable to fulfill the goals I have for myself!

Annoyed: Oh my god. Stop. Stop, world. I need some control and you are not letting me have it.

Vengeful: Thank you for showing me you are happy and pretending you are of sound mind and body. Next time I see you I will tell you all the reasons your narcissism makes others feel terrible about themselves and put you in your place.

Numb: I’ll never be able to speak up. Instead I am going to take these tweezers and spend an hour trying to get my chin whisker out.

Ecstatic: I have put on pants. I have put on mascara. I have agreed to go out to have something to eat. I have had tea/coffee/or a beer and am rambling and excited about the new thing I want to accomplish – tomorrow.

 

 

           
---------------------------------
Time to watch some Firefly and sleep.
ClassyB

Saturday, February 8, 2014

February 8, 2014

Writing Attempt: Continuation

(I'm not posting the whole thing this time so I can highlight what I wrote today)


***

Dr. Oulette stared at the pile of intake forms on his desk and muttered one word over and over: fuck. He called Rachel into his office. Her slow approach was accented by her signature gum snap sonata.

“David?” Rachel’s hip opened the door and kept it open. “What’d you need? I got through the call list. Only four pick-ups. Joaquin Jackson is finally paid in full.”

“Surprising.”

“Only took 6 years. Pretty sure he lost the fillings by now.”

“Rachel, don’t judge. You know-“

“I know, sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“So what’dya want?” Rachel pillaged her pocket for her pen.

“This mandatory healthcare act is fucking fantastic until I have to intake 34 patients in three days and decide who to make priority. I need some front desk intel, if you will.”

“Okay?”

“If I’m going to make this work, while in turn making us a living, I need to find the exact right order to accept these patients in.”

“Okay?” Rachel hit her pen against her teeth three times, then scribbled, ‘riGht Order – PAtients (?) WTF Mr. O’ on her notepad. She touched the end of the pen to her temple. “Maybe something as simple as alphabetical order could work just as well?”

“No. I need the long vs the short term. Who, from what you could tell, is a long-term over a one off? We need to get the one/two visit customers first so we can collect the funds, while slowly courting the possible new relationships.” He pushed the intake mountain towards Rachel. “Just sift and organize – first calls top, descending from there down. Make sense?”

The snap of Rachel’s gum echoed through the empty office. The squeak of Oulette’s sneakers made Rachel’s blood pressure rise. The chill outside made the Dr. thankful that he could afford a car with remote start and seat warmers. The draft from Oulette’s exit shifted the intake mountain from the desk to the floor. Rachel sighed angrily and picked up the only form left on his desk. It read Nate Gowarski.    

***

The goddamn phone at 7am? Nate threw his pillow straight up into the air so it would land on his head. Once it did, he immediately regretted the uncomfortable feeling of the action but applauded the result. The phone rang out. Silenced. Then took a moment to beep its stupid beeps that Nate had chosen for it to beep. He looked at the screen. VM. He looked at the schedule printout for work he kept on his side of the bed. Today was not a work day so he deemed this call was irrelevant until he decided to get up and make it relevant.

***

Please, please don’t pick up. Rachel thought. She counted rings. One, two, three, four – it felt like waiting for a tree to mature. Suddenly - VM – perfect. Rachel left a cryptic message. As she spoke, she tried to mirror the sort of corporate speak the Dr. had instilled in her so as to uphold her presence as a representative of the dental profession. After the final beep, she hung the phone on its cradle, exhaled a sigh of relief and moved onto the next patient.


-------------------------

I cannot believe I am still on this story. Not in a bad way at all, in fact in a really good way. This is exactly the type of growth I wanted to happen during this project. Today is my 1 month anniversary, that's something?!


Classy Biped

Friday, February 7, 2014

February 7n2014


Writing Attempt: Writing x 5

 

 The tooth was rotten. Had been for years. The problem was that the tooth was not aware of this fact, instead it rested comfortably in the place it grew up in and was determined to die in as well. So when woken up to the quick sharp prod and scrape of a sharp metal object, the tooth could do nothing but fight for its life. Its whole being radiated with rage and pulsed with fear. The tooth pushed its whole weight down into the squishy holes that held it home and puffed itself out as big as it could get over and over again.

***

Nate had ignored his molar’s slow decay for numerous reasons. But the day his insurance card arrived in the mail, he decided it was time to be a fucking adult and get the grey, shifting mass checked out.

The woman at the front desk knocked the tip of her pen against her teeth as she read through Nate’s freshly filled out intake sheet. Nate found this incredibly insensitive and wondered if it was actually some strange fetish she had developed from years of filing smelly mouthed, broken toothed losers like him. The woman clicked the pen on more time, then slid the form across the desk towards Nate.

 “You forgot to sign it.”  She said.

“Oh, sorry.” Nate searched around the intake window for something to write with.

“Here.” The desk woman pulled the pen out of her mouth and tossed it on top of the paperwork. “They go missing all the time, use mine.”

“Um, thanks…” He took the pen carefully between the tip of his thumb and forefinger and drew a shaky line. She grabbed the form and added it to the ‘in’ pile. Nate worried that he had just committed himself to a signature he’d never quite remember again.

 “Take a seat, Nathan, Dr. Oulette will be with you shortly.”

Nate did as told as suavely as he possibly could, swiping up a magazine on his way.

            Parenting was less insufferable than expected. In fact Nate was pleased to find 7 great D.I.Y. birthday cake recipes even though he couldn’t remember 7 birthdays to save his life. The door into the dentist’s area rumbled open and a small lady stood in its frame.

“Nathan?”

“Oh, yeah, me.” Nate stood up from his chair and moved his hand around his body to check for everything.

“Ready?” She said, then snapped her gum twice. Yet another offence in Nate’s eyes. 

“Isn’t gum-“ Nate knew he had to stop himself from sentence completion but was so alarmed by the sound of his voice expressing aloud what he had meant to keep in his head he couldn’t make it in time. “…like uh no-no for teeth?”  

“Excuse me?” The desk woman slowly leaned her body against the doorframe and lifted her right brow. Nate noticed her eye color for the first time. They were blue. He nervously took note of this. His ears began to burn. He hadn’t meant to say what he just did. He really didn’t mean to say what he just did and he knew that, his acid reflux knew that, but desk woman did not at all know that. He figured the best course of action would be to apologize and explain that his diarrhea mouth had everything to do with his nerves and nothing to do with her lovely, lovely self and freedom, (that’s it!) freedom to do with and chew whatever she and her mouth pleases.

Nate took a breath, put on a smile and said, “My tooth is dying, I-.” Desk woman rolled her eyes, stepped to the side and Nate walked forward, forward until he was swallowed into the dental violet light.  

***

The tooth held it had lived a worldly life thus far but something about the way it had been touched in the strange bright light made it feel manipulated and dirty. Back in its familiar darkness and less woozy, the tooth was able to reflect more coherently on what was actually going on. It wondered if it had been so foolish to believe that its home would always be its home. It worried that it had been living a life that was never actually its own. It realized that if the events of today meant anything, it was that existence was fleeting and all any tooth ever has on its side was a base function not relating to its own happiness.

That night, the tooth and the toothbrush didn’t speak to one another during their nightly routine. The tooth began to realize that it was the last one to get the joke and could sense the toothbrushes’ pity. It wanted to throb and thrust itself down, down into the soft gum holes and disappear forever, never to be seen again.

***

Nate couldn’t sleep for a mixture of reasons but mostly from the emotional cocktail comprised of anxiety, ennui, self-pity and dysfunction sitting in his belly. As he closed his eyes for the tenth time, he willed himself to imagine something soothing. Something soothing. He thought. Something to soothe. A sooooooothing image. Nothing came. Figures. Nate snorted out the last of his breath, looked at the clock (5:27am) then opened the blinds behind his head. The early light outside reminded him of the violet light and threw him into a shame spiral.

            Why did you let that tooth get so fucking bad?

            What’s wrong with you?

            What are you so afraid of?

            Pain?

            No.

            Money?

            Yes.

            Admitting that after 32 years, you still don’t take care of yourself like your younger brother does and seemingly every other rational, functioning, prospering person you know at your age and younger?

            Yes?

            Seriously, what is wrong with you?

            I’m depressed.

            I’m afraid of life.

            But you’re afraid to die.

            Yes.

            So, I reiterate – what the fuck is wrong with you?

 

A ray of sunlight broke through the narrow alley that Nate’s bedroom window faced and cast a great shadow on the wall across from him. The shadow was explainable, the empty soda bottle chilling on his windowsill provided a smooth and menacing shape when hit by the morning sunlight. What wasn’t explainable was the sudden tsunami wave of fear and inadequacy that engulfed Nate as he imagined the shadow as a deity approaching, ready to take him away from his earthly home.

 

***

Dr. Oulette stared at the pile of intake forms on his desk and muttered one word over and over: fuck. He called Rachel into his office. Her slow approach was accented by her signature gum snap sonata.

“David?” Rachel’s hip opened the door and kept it open. “What’d you need? I got through the call list. Only four pick-ups. Joaquin Jackson is finally paid in full.”

“Suprising.”

“Only took 6 years. Pretty sure he lost the fillings by now.”

“Rachel, don’t judge. You know-“

“I know, sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.”

“So what’dya want?” Rachel pillaged her pocket for her pen.

“This mandatory healthcare act is fucking fantastic until I have to intake 34 patients in three days and decide who to make priority. I need some front desk intel, if you will.”

“Okay?”

“If I’m going to make this work, and get us actual profit for my services, I need to find the exact right order to accept these patients in.”

“Okay?” Rachel hit her pen against her teeth three times, then scribbled, ‘riGht Order – PAtients (?) WTF Mr. O’ on her notepad. She touched the end of the pen to her temple. “Maybe something as simple as alphabetical order could work just as well?”

“No. I need the long vs the short term. Who, from what you could tell, is a long-term over a one off? We need to get the one/two visit customers first so we can collect the funds, while slowly courting the possible new relationships.” He pushed the intake mountain towards Rachel. “Just sift and organize – first calls top, descending from there down. Make sense?”

The snap of Rachel’s gum echoed through the empty office. The squeak of Oulette’s sneakers made Rachel’s blood pressure rise. The chill outside made the Dr. thankful that he could afford a car with remote start and seat warmers. The draft from Oulette’s exit shifted the intake mountain from the desk to the floor. Rachel sighed angrily and picked up the only form left on his desk. It read Nate Gowarski.    

 
----------------------

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classyb

Thursday, February 6, 2014

February 6, 2014


Writing Attempt: Writing x4

 

 The tooth was rotten. Had been for years. The problem was that the tooth was not aware of this fact, instead it rested comfortably in the place it grew up in and was determined to die in as well. So when woken up to the quick sharp prod and scrape of a sharp metal object, the tooth could do nothing but fight for its life. Its whole being radiated with rage and pulsed with fear. The tooth pushed its whole weight down into the squishy holes that held it home and puffed itself out as big as it could get over and over again.

***

Nate had ignored his molar’s slow decay for numerous reasons. But the day his insurance card arrived in the mail, he decided it was time to be a fucking adult and get the grey, shifting mass checked out.

The woman at the front desk knocked the tip of her pen against her teeth as she read through Nate’s freshly filled out intake sheet. Nate found this incredibly insensitive and wondered if it was actually some strange fetish she had developed from years of filing smelly mouthed, broken toothed losers like him. The woman clicked the pen on more time, then slid the form across the desk towards Nate.

 “You forgot to sign it.”  She said.

“Oh, sorry.” Nate searched around the intake window for something to write with.

“Here.” The desk woman pulled the pen out of her mouth and tossed it on top of the paperwork. “They go missing all the time, use mine.”

“Um, thanks…” He took the pen carefully between the tip of his thumb and forefinger and drew a shaky line. She grabbed the form and added it to the ‘in’ pile. Nate worried that he had just committed himself to a signature he’d never quite remember again.

 “Take a seat, Nathan, Dr. Oulette will be with you shortly.”

Nate did as told as suavely as he possibly could, swiping up a magazine on his way.

            Parenting was less insufferable than expected. In fact Nate was pleased to find 7 great D.I.Y. birthday cake recipes even though he couldn’t remember 7 birthdays to save his life. The door into the dentist’s area rumbled open and a small lady stood in its frame.

“Nathan?”

“Oh, yeah, me.” Nate stood up from his chair and moved his hand around his body to check for everything.

“Ready?” She said, then snapped her gum twice. Yet another offence in Nate’s eyes.  

“Isn’t gum-“ Nate knew he had to stop himself from sentence completion but was so alarmed by the sound of his voice expressing aloud what he had meant to keep in his head he couldn’t make it in time. “…like uh no-no for teeth?”  

“Excuse me?” The desk woman slowly leaned her body against the doorframe and lifted her right brow. Nate noticed her eye color for the first time. They were blue. He nervously took note of this. His ears began to burn. He hadn’t meant to say what he just did. He really didn’t mean to say what he just did and he knew that, his acid reflux knew that, but desk woman did not at all know that. He figured the best course of action would be to apologize and explain that his diarrhea mouth had everything to do with his nerves and nothing to do with her lovely, lovely self and freedom, (that’s it!) freedom to do with and chew what ever she and her mouth pleases.

Nate took a breath, put on a smile and said, “My tooth is dying, I-.” Desk woman rolled her eyes, stepped to the side and Nate walked forward, forward until he was swallowed into the dental violet light.  

***

The tooth held it had lived a worldly life thus far but something about the way it had been touched in the strange bright light made it feel manipulated and dirty. Back in its familiar darkness and less woozy, the tooth was able to reflect more coherently on what was actually going on. It wondered if it had been so foolish to believe that its home would always be its home. It worried that it had been living a life that was never actually its own. It realized that if the events of today meant anything, it was that existence was fleeting and all any tooth ever has on its side was a base function not relating to its own happiness.

That night, the tooth and the toothbrush didn’t speak to one another during their nightly routine. The tooth began to realize that it was the last one to get the joke and could sense the toothbrushes’ pity. It wanted to throb and thrust itself down, down into the soft gum holes and disappear forever, never to be seen again.

***

Nate couldn’t sleep for a mixture of reasons but mostly from the emotional cocktail comprised of anxiety, ennui, self-pity and dysfunction sitting in his belly. As he closed his eyes for the tenth time, he willed himself to imagine something soothing. Something soothing. He thought. Something to soothe. A sooooooothing image. Nothing came. Figures. Nate snorted out the last of his breath, looked at the clock (5:27am) then opened the blinds behind his head. The early light outside reminded him of the violet light and threw him into a shame spiral.

            Why did you let that tooth get so fucking bad?

            What’s wrong with you?

            What are you so afraid of?

            Pain?

            No.

            Money?

            Yes.

            Admitting that after 32 years, you still don’t take care of yourself like your younger brother does and seemingly every other rational, functioning, prospering person you know at your age and younger?

            Yes?

            Seriously, what is wrong with you?

            I’m depressed.

            I’m afraid of life.

            But you’re afraid to die.

            Yes.

            So, I reiterate – what the fuck is wrong with you?

 

A ray of sunlight broke through the narrow alley that Nate’s bedroom window faced and cast a shadow on the wall across from him. The shadow was explainable, the empty soda bottle on his windowsill was framed perfectly on the adjacent wall. What wasn’t explainable was the sudden tsunami wave of fear and inadequacy that engulfed Nate as he imagined the shadow as a deity approaching, ready to take him away from his earthly home.
 
 
 
--------------------------------
 
 
Eeeesh!
 
ClassyBiped

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

February 5th 2014


Writing Attempt: Writing x3

 

 The tooth was rotten. Had been for years. The problem was that the tooth was not aware of this fact, instead it rested comfortably in the place it grew up in and was determined to die in as well. So when woken up to the quick sharp prod and scrape of a sharp metal object, the tooth could do nothing but fight for its life. Its whole being radiated with rage and pulsed with fear. The tooth pushed its whole weight down into the squishy holes that held it home and puffed itself out as big as it could get over and over again.

***

Nate had ignored his molar’s slow decay for numerous reasons. But the day his insurance card arrived in the mail, he decided it was time to be a fucking adult and get the grey, shifting mass checked out.

The woman at the front desk knocked the tip of her pen against her teeth as she read through Nate’s freshly filled out intake sheet. Nate found this incredibly insensitive and wondered if it was actually some strange fetish she had developed from years of filing smelly mouthed, broken toothed losers like him. The woman clicked the pen on more time, then slid the form across the desk towards Nate.

 “You forgot to sign it.”  She said.

“Oh, sorry.” Nate searched around the intake window for something to write with.

“Here.” The desk woman pulled the pen out of her mouth and tossed it on top of the paperwork. “They go missing all the time, use mine.”

“Um, thanks…” He took the pen carefully between the tip of his thumb and forefinger and drew a shaky line. She grabbed the form and added it to the ‘in’ pile. Nate worried that he had just committed himself to a signature he’d never quite remember again.

 “Take a seat, Nathan, Dr. Oulette will be with you shortly.”

Nate did as told as suavely as he possibly could, swiping up a magazine on his way.

            Parenting was less insufferable than expected. In fact Nate was pleased to find 7 great D.I.Y. birthday cake recipes even though he couldn’t remember 7 birthdays to save his life. The door into the dentist’s area rumbled open and a small lady stood in its frame.

“Nathan?”

“Oh, yeah, me.” Nate stood up from his chair and moved his hand around his body to check for everything.

“Ready?” She spat.

“Right, yes. I mean ready.” Nate walked forward, forward until he was swallowed into the dental violet light.  

***

The tooth held it had lived a worldly life thus far but something about the way it had been touched in the strange bright light made it feel manipulated and dirty. Back in its familiar darkness and less woozy, the tooth was able to reflect more coherently on what was actually going on. It wondered if it had been so foolish to believe that its home would always be its home. It worried that it had been living a life that was never actually its own. It realized that if the events of today meant anything, it was that existence was fleeting and all any tooth ever has on its side was a base function not relating to its own happiness.

That night, the tooth and the toothbrush didn’t speak to one another during their nightly routine. The tooth began to realize that it was the last one to get the joke and could sense the toothbrushes’ pity. It wanted to throb and thrust itself down, down into the soft gum holes and disappear forever, never to be seen again.

***

Nate couldn’t sleep for a mixture of reasons but mostly from the emotional cocktail comprised of anxiety, ennui, self-pity and dysfunction sitting in his belly. As he closed his eyes for the tenth time, he willed himself to imagine something soothing. Something soothing. He thought. Something to soothe. A sooooooothing image. Nothing came. Figures. Nate snorted out the last of his breath, looked at the clock (5:27am) then opened the blinds behind his head. The early light outside reminded him of the dental appointment earlier and threw him into a shame spiral.
 
 
--------
 
I'm still editing whilst writing this. Also, I will probably be reading this out loud on Friday.
 
-Classy Biped